Weekly Confessional

I'm terribly tired today in an abnormal kind of way, albeit not totally out of character for me, I stayed up late watching too many episodes of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. It's like I'm hungover yet instead of booze it involved three Drumstick ice cream cones, water to aide in the foreseen morning regret (didn't work) and loads of head shaking at anything Kris Jenner spewed out of her mouth hole. I have a definite crick in my neck but that's probably from falling asleep on the couch. I got a phone call this morning at 7:30 (which is when I'm supposed to leave) from my husband who was lying in our marital bed. My alarm went off but I must have drowned out the sound from it with my snoring. "I'm up! [or something more vial and mean]

I had a funny line to end this with but honestly can't remember it now. I think that Florida face-eating man might have paid a visit to my brains last night in my sleep (or someone who was infected by him.) It's the only rationale explanation.

If you haven't heard this story yet you have to read the story I linked to above. This is crazy. I mean I heard the guy was high on bath salts but obviously that's just a cover up. The zombie plague, it has begun people.

Here is a snippet for your enjoyment:

"Vega flagged down the Miami police officer, who can be seen exiting his car on the Herald video. Vega said the officer repeatedly ordered the attacker to get off. Eugene just picked his head up and growled at the officer before continuing to maul his victim, Vega said. The officer shot Eugene, but he just kept chewing, Vega said. The officer fired again, killing Eugene."

dip dye attempt

So I'm finally finished with my hair. I don't hate it but I'm not in love with it either. I'm going to try the purple again in a week or so. I just used the Splat brand box from Walmart that comes with bleach & dye so I didn't expect perfection and I know that my hair is tough at times. About ten years ago I dyed the bottom ends (dip dyed) my hair a raspberry fuscia color and the first time didn't take so well but when I did it again myself a bit later it worked perfectly. I've kept my hair brown now for awhile and I hate it when it's just natural. If you follow me on twitter you know that I tried bleaching it last weekend and gave up till I finished it last night finally. I don't mind the way it looks right now but because it didn't turn out how I envisioned it to I'm comfortable with it. When I have something set in my mind (in my brain) then I'll keep at it till it's how I like it. 

Brown before

Splat

Bleach

Purple/Orange/Pink after

some spots took better than others, it was like in some places it literally refused to dye

summer fits

I decided to play on Polyvore tonight because I had the itch to go shopping and I thought it would help but I think it just made it worse. 

I didn't link to every item because I didn't feel like it but if you want to know where the items come from you can check out my polyvore page but I never go on it regularly. 

I'm still in love with my alter ego outfit.

via my phone (passive aggressive disclaimer)

I was excited to see the annular solar eclipse tonight. I'm glad the makeshift paper reverse lense worked out for us. It wasn't until after I took this that we realized that there were a bunch of little eclipses on the wall on the left side of this picture coming from the tree in the parking lot. It only lasted a few minutes so I'm glad we walked out at the perfect moment. I almost didn't get up because I've been pretty enthralled in watching the X Files. 

If you have no idea what I'm talking about it's the little half moons showing up all over the wall. Because of where we were in the state we didn't get the full ring of fire. 

earlier today there was a rainbow around the sun it was pretty cool but this was the best pic I could get

Steak for $1 at Dollar Tree? I'd rather eat one of Frederick's legs.

If you follow me on instagram you've already seen most of these but 

if you don't you can see them here or you can search for zenmasterflash (which is what I wish my twitter name was but some other a-hole has it)

in the process of dying my hair, bleaching didn't go well but imma gonna finish this shit if it kills me

I'll be adding purple tomorrow night, for now I'll deal with the orange tones.

found a new phone app sketch n draw

My mom is the best. She tricked me into coming down to her house to help her pick out face powder when really she wanted to get me a gift. She knew she had to trick me or I wouldn't have come down just to have her buy me something. She was right. She got me a retro style bathing suit that I've been wanting forever. We got it at JCPenney of all places. They had a ton of suits and a lot of retro styles for pretty cheap too. There's a ton online that I've had my eye on but when you're not skinny minnie you do not want to guess which suit is going to fit well you have to be able to try them on as excruciating of a task that is.

Went to a pool party today and it was a lot of fun laying out in the sun for the first time of the year.

And the awesome day was only interrupted for a brief moment. It's sad when some people feel the need to threaten someone for merely having a different opinion than them, especially when it's family.

Let's give it up for this coming weekend when a lot of us will be enjoying along one for the holiday - I already can't wait!

In My Brain

{once again pretend there's an adorable header to look at here}

Despite my usual bitter attitude towards motherhood, I really, truly hope that every mother out there had a great Mothers Day. I realize I'm behind on saying this but I'm behind on a lot of things right now so STOP YELLING AT ME!!!!

Last Wednesday I took my mom to City Creek and bought her dinner and some fudge. She's a fudge whore. I on the other hand hate fudge. We had a lovely time walking around and checking out all of the overpriced stores. I tend to think most stores are overpriced because I do 95% of my shopping now at thrift stores and the other 5% online (let me recalculate this 93% thrift 5% online 3% other that probably doesn't add up because I SUCK AT MATH!) I really enjoyed being alone with my mom. I think it was more of a gift to me rather than her to be honest. Don't get me wrong, I love hanging out with my whole family but we do it often and sometimes a girl needs to be with just her mom.

Sunday, we took my MIL out to lunch (she's never had a 5 guys burger) and out to see the avengers. It was pretty awesome if I do say so myself. We even saw it in 3D, which I despise, but it turned out to by pretty incredible. I would like to see a great movie on the IMAX screen but NOT in 3D just once. Do we not do that anymore? 3D glasses give me a headache because I HAVE to wear them over my regular eye glasses. It's not comfortable and I have this weird thing where I have to be comfortable when I'm watching a movie or I won't enjoy it as much.

I bought hair bleach and dye on Sunday but I was too tired to start it all week so I think I'll do it tomorrow. I already know I won't have the motivation to do it tonight. I'm giving in and doing the ombre look with a purple twist. One of the reasons I have procrastinated doing this myself is that I have to cut and thin out my own hair and that takes me forever to do. I am too cheap to go to a stylist plus I hate calling and setting up appointments for things, really anything, I get all sorts of anxiety when I have to do it.I avoid it at all costs and will procrastinate an important appointment up and until the very last minute. I loathe this about myself but I crumble under the anxiety from it.

Today was an interesting Monday, for once I wasn't left wanting to pick my eyeballs out with a bobby pin.

I'm sad The Voice is over. Judge away.

Greys Anatomy - OMG! (this was pretty much the twitter collective last night)

Right at this moment my glasses are driving me crazy and as well as my allergies.

I'd like to rate the different types of pens for my own amusement:
1. Roller ball pens are the best. They're smooth like butta.
2. Ball point pens are mediocre.
3. Gel pens can suck a d*#%$

This post felt very robotic. I'm usually that way at work; it's the only way I get through the day. I pretend I'm Small Wonder and am secretly planning my takeover of the world. Speaking of taking over the world do you remember watching Pinky & The Brain after school usually with Animaniacs? Gawd! I just want to go home after work and watch it like I did after school with a giant cup of milk. Instead I watch Jeopardy right after work or something more embarrassing to admit.

On the topic of being brainless, I just now mindlessly hung up my calendar displaying the month of June. I apparently hate May and can't wait for June to be here. My subconscious knows that I have a vacation coming up in June that I desperately need to get here as fast as it can.

I won't lie, work has aggressively sucked this week. I mean hardcore sucky.

I'd like to thank the academy for allowing me this opportunity to speak my mind. (I want to hurt myself so bad right now for saying that.)

photo album turned journal

What? Another blogger and a lame ass journal DIY? How original. I know, I know.

I've been pretty introverted lately and taking the time to doodle and reflect on things so journaling has been nice to do. I usually always doodle and jot down song lyrics or ideas in notebooks but I rarely specify a certain book just for journaling. I don't know what is going on with this mercury venus retrograde downgrade whatever business but it needs to stop. Everyone I know is in some funk whether or not it's full blown depression or just a weird funk. Whatever planet that has it's period needs to stop bleeding already. (was that too graphic? oh well, blame the funk)

I saw this seventies photo album at Savers and took out the inside pages and replace them with paper from an old accounting ledger that was sitting right next to the album. It was like the heavens just handed me a DIY, I couldn't possibly pass it up. Plus, I love these old photo albums with covers like this.

I adhered the pages with glue and gold duct tape.

inside cover

 It's still in basic mode and I didn't take pics of every page because I wanted to keep some of them private.

more DIY polaroids

I printed more DIY polaroids & stuck them to the wall near my bedside with japanese washi tape.

Perfect.

you can see how crappy my printer is (i loathe my epson printer)

Check out the original post and how-to here.

Secretary Bow Top!

I decided to try this DIY from a beautiful mess. They pretty much do everything perfectly which most of the time just makes me want to throw up from pure jealousy. Admittedly, they're the first blog I read every day (that is when I'm able to actually read blogs) Anyway, I'm on a super secretary blouse kick and or ascot top whatever you want to call it. I have a few that need to go up in my shop right now as well. I've been drooling over this top in that etsy shop (also this one) for weeks now (it has since sold) but TODAY I found one at the thrift that is exactly like it. I'm stoked! It's not really warm weather appropriate but it will be perfect when fall comes.

With this particular top I decided to go sleeveless so I could wear it this summer and with a cardigan for the office.

Before

After

I left a tiny cap sleeve.

In all I would say that it was fairly easy. More sewing than I usually like to accomplish. I'm the laziest sewer you'll ever meet. I have done an abnormal amount of sewing lately, mostly mending and repairing some clothes I've had in a "I'll get around to it one day" pile. I'm so proud of myself. It's like going shopping and having new clothes because they've sat around for too long.