July 29, 2015

15 boring thing about me

I studied legal administration in college – AA

I like pens

I like doing my budget

I don't like being late on bills

I can't stand to run out of paper towels, TP or tissue

I have to clean off my desk before I leave work or I won't sleep

I can't stand it when my car is dirty

I like to chop veggies, onions, etc.

I eat the same thing for breakfast every morning M – F

Making lists – crossing stuff off said list gives me a boner

I enjoy NPR – not PBR

I don't make my bed in the mornings but it has to be made before I get in bed at night

I am a Notary  Public

I like white rice with butter

Heart eyes for Milk all day

July 21, 2015

7 Things

1. I still need to unpack all of our camping shit.

2. Tonight Say Anything is playing and I want to go but I'm not going because I'm going to play the tired card.

3. A couple of weekends ago I was supposed to get 15K steps for the GCC2015 challenge I signed up for at work; I got 16K. I got to work on Monday to find out the Bionic Woman got 19K. She kicked my ass. I think her bionic leg gives her special powers. We walk together every morning in the parking garage and she is very motivational to me. She NEVER complains about being an amputee and NEVER uses it to get special treatment. We have people in our office who use whatever "medical condition" they don't have to get special treatment but she doesn't do it and she is one of two people who would have any real right to do so.

4. I can't believe July is almost over. School supply ads have begun. I love buying school office supplies. When I was a kid it was the best part of starting school until the day actually arrived and I wanted to stay home.

5. My current most used emojis. I know this is probably lame to post but it always cracks me up. Tyrone and I can have entire conversations using only emojis.

6. Last night Art Bell returned to late night radio and I could not have been more happy. Unfortunately, I fell asleep much too early while listening to it.

7. Yesterday was a great mail day. I went crazy about a week ago and bought some stuff. These 3 were among my favorites. I am going to put them on my cubicle shelf.

I like Mondays

I like Mondays. I am at my most productive on Mondays. It's pretty effed up when I think about it considering the high level of Sunday night anxiety that occurs. Yesterday was a great morning and I think it's because it was raining. The weather was blistering and it was dark and muggy. I don't like it to be dark all of the time but I do love the rain and when there's a bit of moisture in the air.

And with that said, I'm ready to apply for my AARP card.

This past weekend we went camping and I had a great time. I wasn't pissed off and ornery the whole time. I don't know what got into me but I was happy that the feeling carried over into Monday for most of the day.

I took a walk around 10am in the rain and it was quite lovely if I dare say. I also treated myself to my current favorite lunch spot, Spitz, to continue all the feel-goods I was having. This place is the BEST! I love that it is decorated like"street-art" inside. I get the garden bowl with chicken and I literally drool over my desk the entire time I'm shoveling it in down my face-hole.

July 16, 2015

7 or 8 Things

bathroom selfie #whynot

1. We're going camping this weekend and standard protocol dictates that I be anxious all week. ALSO!!!!!! Aunt Fucking Flow is scheduled to make an appearance as well. She's a bloody cunt.

2. Tuesday night we finally finished cleaning our carpets from Fecal Festival 2015 starring Frederick Biggie Franklin with diarrhea on the backup mic. He decided that he not only defecate in the living room in four different spots but also in the spare room and the hallway. It was liquid tar that stained our souls, oh, and the cheap apartment carpet we have. We were able to borrow my moms carpet cleaner and get most of it out. That was a process in and of itself but way easier than any carpet cleaning experience I've had in the past. He was finally allowed out of the bathroom yesterday and no incidents occurred. This dog just cannot eat any human food.

3.  I'm tired. WHAT'S NEW??!!

4. I had the best idea the other day and it occurred to me while I was thinking about camping. We don't have a truck or all-terrain vehicle,just two cars. They are great cars but they can't go where we go camping. I was thinking, wouldn't it be great if they  had transformer cars that could turn into mini monster-style trucks. For instance, my car is a hatchback and would be perfect for it, so when I was ready to go off-road it would rise up and big tires would come out from under it. You could switch back-and-forth whenever you needed it to. Tyrone immediately laughed and began explaining to me in his engineer (nerdy) way how that would never work. Even after his explanation I still don't see why it wouldn't work and WHY has it not been invented yet?

5. I'm ready for a real vacation. I've been listening to Major Lazer for the last few hours on soundcloud and it's making me want to get away.

6. Sometimes he's sweet and holds on to me.

7. Me and this guy. He's so sweet when he's getting his way (just like his dad). I'm wearing a "heart" made by his brother.

8. I scratched my car AGAIN!! I ran over a curb and got it pretty badly. MY BRAIN IS NO LONGER FUNCTIONING PROPERLY! This one will not be able to be waxed away.

Big Ass Show

Since it's been awhile since we went to this show I just want to share this silly video of this dude who jammed the entire time. I'm usually one of the oldest people at the concerts I go to but this couple beat me by a few decades and they didn't disappoint. Proof,  - there are older people than me.

New Politics - they never dissapoint

July 8, 2015

7 Things

1. I spent 3.5 hours on Saturday waxing my car because I have such a nice car that it needs to be hand-waxed every weekend. HA!! It's just a Mazda for crying out loud. The reason I did this is because at work last week I scratched it in the parking garage. In the lot there are these foam things attached to some of the tight corners so that you don't completely demolish your car on the concrete when you're sexting and driving. I was not sexting but I wish I had been so I had a good reason as to why I hit the foam corner. I've been driving in this lot for 8 fucking years and have never hit anything until now. I wasn't sexting or adjusting my bra strap or even eating anything worth pulling my attention away from the road. I just took my good luck for granted and swiped the passenger side of the back half of my car against the yellow painted foam which is not that soft but I guess it's better than hitting concrete. It left a good 2 x 2 row of thin scratches down it. It was enough to send me into crazy town. The day before I waxed it I was with Ty in Auto Zone picking up the wax and he went on about how "We'll" go about getting this done and I told him I was doing it on Friday on my day off by myself while he's gone wake boarding. He looked at me puzzled and a little insulting and said "You're going to wax the your whole car by yourself?" At the time I thought how rude of him to assume I couldn't do this. I went on to tell him how I have done this before and that I had no issue doing it by myself. I didn't. That is until 2 hours into trying to buff off the wax my arms decided that I was a crazy bitch and that they had enough. I begrudgingly admitted to him later that I had bitten off more than I could chew. The wax I used in the past wasn't heavy duty like this one had been. I can see why people charge $200 to do it. It sucks!! 

I'm exhausted now, but the entire reason I brought this story up was because it rained on Saturday on my way to my brother's house. I was certain I single-handedly caused it to rain over the weekend. On Monday at work I looked up the weather and it said it wasn't supposed to rain until Wednesday so I rain really quickly to my favorite car wash downtown just get the water spots off. I didn't want my entire wax job to be all for nothing, so I ran over on my lunch break. By the time I got off work it was down pouring so badly I could have spit fire out my ass all of the way home. I was so pissed off. 

Good news though the scratches are about 75% gone now.

2. I waxed my car at my parent's house because I could do it under their tree in the shade and use their hose. My mom told he some more information about my friend's death. She hesitated telling me about it but I thought I was good and had moved on a bit so I told her not to leave anything out. I just started bawling when she told me. It just hit me so hard again. It's funny when you think you're okay about something then you just lose it when you least expect it. The most details I learn the more  I realize how horrific it was for her. 

3. I drank too much water today at work because I'm trying to flush out the shit I ate over the holiday weekend. My kidneys hate me. I've already had to pee five times before 10 am so I'm sitting here trying to hold it in because I don't want to be The Girl With the Skull Tattoo Who Pees Too Much. Plus it smells and I don't want to add Girl With The Stinky Pee to my fictional reputation.


3. Tyrone has been hijacking my snapchat account lately. It's a good thing Shelby and Kendahl are the only ones that follow me on there. He is the King of The Unflattering Angle. I even changed my password on my phone due to this but he is so quick to snatch my phone when I'm not looking and forget to lock it. 

4. My brother and I text each other the weirdest shit sometimes.

5. I'm so glad I don't have to run everything by Tyrone first before I do anything at all. I'm glad we don't have that type of a relationship. I'm so thankful I'm not scared of him and that he doesn't treat me like a child. 

6. You know that one person at work with the annoying voice? Yeah that.

7. I just found out that Cindy Mancini died. I want to cry! She was the coolest ever! Her in that white leather fringe bra thingy? That is one of my favorite all time teenage dream movies. Damn! It looks like she had a rough life. Too bad.