November 2, 2010

Weekly Confessional where I totally gross you guys out

You've seen the Shallow Hal movie with Jack Black, right? I'll wait right here for you to do so immediately if you haven't.



Waiting.


Waiting.


You're back? Great. Now that we're all on the same page you remember Ralph? Rosemary's ex? The one with the really bad psoriasis? It was like a floating hallow around his head?


Yep. That's me.


I tried finding a good picture of him but fell short.

My brother and I were not blessed with our mother's skin even though we have different biological fathers (Remember how I told you Steve Perry is my dad?) we have very similar skin conditions. I won't dive into my brother's skin issues on here. Believe me you do NOT want me to dive into that mess. I shudder just thinking about his toenails. God bless him.


Now because I said God bless him that means I can say whatever I want about him right? That's what old maids do and since I'm still childless and in my thirties I can call myself an old maid and start saying ridiculous things and be excused from it if I say "God Bless Him" or "God bless his heart". Did you hear that Ms. So-and-so had an affair with Mr. Who-gives-a-rats-ass in the bathroom of the new Chik Fillet in American Fork? God bless their whorish hearts.


Psoriasis. Eczema. Dermatitis. Fungi. Fungi. Fungi. Allergies. More fungi. Leprosy. Flesh eating zombie virus. Blah. Blah. Blah.


I've been plagued with dandruff from time to time during my life and have had psoriasis on my forhead for awhile now. I keep both under semi-control the best I can. I have things I do for the psoriasis that help a lot. It rarely surfaces now days. I've recently started getting something different, which I assumed at first was psoriasis around the corner of my eyes. At first it was just my left eye and now it's also on my right eye. I tried putting my special remedies on both eyes for awhile but it wouldn't budge. I also got this prescription stuff from my friend that totally worked except after using it for a few weeks found out that I wasn't suppose to be using it for longer than a week. Something about it thinning out my skin too much. I stopped using it. I've done a few searches on the all knowing Google master and found that I think, I think, it is Dermatitis but could also be Eczema. It's so frustrating!

The other day when everything was all a flair! Tyrone looked at me and said (in his most sympathetic voice possible) "When I look at you, you make me want to itch." I tried taking a picture of it but it doesn't show up every well. You would all just think I was overreacting if I posted a picture. You have to see it in PERSON to get the idea. 

Good thing I have a doctor's appointment this week which I made after sweating profusely with anxiety (I hate seeing the doctor). It's just one of the many things I can ask him about.

BIG UP to getting older. Thanks for stopping by, please come back again. My Weekly Confessionals aren't always filled with such disgusting detail.

Pals on Twitter? Let's do this, my handle is @masterflash7

6 comments:

FALEN AKA THUNDERCAT832 said...

now I might gross you out when I say this....I LOVE THAT SHIT! I dated a guy once who had crazy flakes too and I used to wait for him to fall asleep to pick and scratch at it! I LOVE IT TO DEATH! I love scratching at the flakes I can't help it!

Jennikunz said...

ewh Thundercat!!
Anyway Bray I had no idea! I have never notice your skin falling off!

Shawna said...

I dont know if you are into herbs at all but my friend suffers from psoriasis and she takes Yellow Dock root. You can get it at the herb store and it helps her alot.

The Bipolar Diva said...

One of my sons deals with that and it's no fun at all! Sorry you have to endure that.

brandy-son Zen master flash said...

The psoriasis is under control. It's the new stuff on my face that's bothering me. I use coconut oil and hydrogen peroxide for the psoriasis and love it.

Thanks Bipolar Diva!

Thundercat I can always count on you for the ick factor! You are strange...in a very good way!

bebe bird beck said...

hahah.. You are so funny.
I'm sorry you have to deal with that.. that sucks real bad. My mother in law has it and hates it so much. I love the God bless him part. Oh gosh, so freakin true.